India through Naipaul’s eyes

Growing up like most Indians with a Congress Party sanctioned version of history (proving the old adage about how ‘history’ is a version decided by the winners) I realized, quite late in life, I really didn’t have the foggiest clue about what my India was all about. When you read  Michel de Montaigne lament, “Nothing is so firmly believed as what we least know” , you begin to question your true right to partake in any serious debate if your only exposure to your country’s history is to a distorted,  intellectually bankrupt version of the events (aka your C.B.S.E issued, officially sanctioned history text books).

And it is in some ways a fascinating history and the more media I consumed the more I realized how little attention 1/6th of humanity gets as a part of general global dialogue. So I decided I was going to find out more about India in a broader, nuanced, and cultural sense.

While it is difficult to get an unbiased outsider view of anything in the real sense, for this ambitious project I decided to go with Nobel laureate V.S Naipaul and by God, he didn’t disappoint!

I juxtaposed all this literature with what I was reading on the Anna Hazare agitation with Naipaul’s observations in his books and it all becomes spooky and prescient. Here is one that kicks you right in the gut. Read the last line and know Naipaul wrote that in 1977.

“All creation in India hints at the imminence of interruption and
destruction. Building is like an elemental urge, like the act of
sex among the starved. It is building for the sake of building,
creation for the sake of creation; and each creation is separate, a
beginning and an end in itself…. but at Mahabalipuram near
Madras, on the waste sand of the sea shore, stands the abandoned
Shore Temple, its carvings worn smooth after twelve centuries of
rain and salt and wind…. In India these endless mosques and
rhetorical mausolea, these great palaces speak only of a personal
plunder and a country with an infinite capacity for being
plundered.”

(Area of Darkness, page 219, Chapter ‘Fantasy and Ruins’)

Or here is another gem :

“Out of its squalor and human decay, its eruptions of butchery, India produced so many people of grace and beauty, ruled by elaborate courtesy. Producing too much life, it denied the value of life; yet it permitted a unique human development to so many”

His trilogy deserve more publicity than it will ever get as it is one part utterly scathing social commentary and two parts wholly pessimistic about the Indian narrative. It is a terribly gloomy and dark fatalistic vision of things and I urge people who believe in rainbows, unicorns and innocence of kittens and puppies to never ever attempt this Everest.

For those who are fans of Orwell and could stomach 1984, you cannot and should not miss this set.

As for ‘A bend in the River’ and ‘Among the believers’, the former is just utter brilliant prose ( “The world is what it is; men who are nothing, who allow themselves to become nothing, have no place in it.”, “After all, we make ourselves according to the ideas we have of our possibilities.”) and the latter will help you understand Islamic fundamentalism better than all the blather you hear on NDTV, CNN and BBC.

All 5 books deserve prominent place in the shelves of any serious literature aficionado. Read them once before you join the next Hazare protest movement.

On The Most Precious Commodity today

We are sitting across a table. You were on your way to meet friends for a beer after work. You don’t hate me but don’t like me either. I am a genial stranger to you.

Scenario#1
I am asking 100 rupees from you. How valuable is that to you ? Would you willingly pay it to get out and move on with your plans ?

Scenario#2
Now I am asking 100 minutes of your time. To help me move some boxes around the office or some such job that requires your physical presence only. BUT I give you a way out. Pay me whatever you feel is appropriate and you can go. Would you pay ? What is 100 minutes of your time worth to you ?

Scenario#3
I am asking 100 minutes of your UNDIVIDED ATTENTION. NO CHEATING. You have to sit in a chair and look at something mentally taxing for 100 minutes and no cheating. Plus No phones, no laptops, no multitasking. BUT here too I give you a way out. Pay me a appropriate sum and you can go. What would you pay ? What is 100 minutes of your UNDIVIDED attention worth to you ?

Upto the end of the 20th century Capital was the #1 scarcest resource . In the 21st, the most valuable commodity in a world with with 500 channels and a million+ websites and a gazillion ads seeking your attention is YOUR ATTENTION.

So act like it and don’t give it away too easily to anybody.  And make people earn it. Really earn it. And don’t give second chances to those who squander your attention.  Hold websites, TV, other media and people to these standards. I see too many busy smart people I know act like the easiest thing you can get from them is their attention. That’s stupid.

And watch this brilliant 20 minute video titled ‘May I have your attention please?’ by smart girl Linda Stone at SIME 2009.

It’s worth your attention.

Make Complaining Painless for Customers

Feedback is called the Breakfast of Champions. How easy do you make it for your customer to give you feedback ? How easy is it for you to give feedback to your favorite brands ?

If the process of giving feedback is onerous or exhausting, and your excuse is ‘Our business model is complicated and spread across a huge geography’ I recommend you read up on Zappos and Amazon and how they ended up where they are today. Remember that pithy saying: If you want to find a shortcut way to do a job, give it to a lazy man – he will always finish the job with a minimum of energy output. Make it so that the laziest fan of your product/service can give you feedback with no excuse. Disclaimer : Of course if you are a seller of shoddy products or services you are most likely not too keen to make it easy for your unfortunate ‘victims’ (they are victims more than they are customers) to get in touch with you. Also if you are government entity you positively don’t give a fish. And the very worst thing you can do is install one of those eternally optimistic ‘suggestion boxes’ that will be used to collect cigarettes butts and paper waste for all its life. That was last a good idea in 1967.

Jeff Immelt, GE CEO gave this advice to a deputy: “Spend a ton of time with your customers. Especially when you’re new, the first thing you should do is go out to customers and ask them how you compare with competitors, how your service is, what they think of your products. ….(inside the company)…people tend to get enamored with your title, and people want to look good in front of you. Customers will give you the reality. They don’t care about your title, they just want value. You’ll never get anything straighter than from a customer.”

Now, India, following a global trend, is selling a record number of smart phones. Customers are getting wired faster than ever here. Are you now making it easy for them to reach out to you now that they have some cool, always connected tools to do it ? How easy is it for your customer armed with a BlackBerry/iPhone/Smartphone to email you feedback that helps you get even better at what you do ? And remember, loading your bloated flash heavy company web address on a Smartphone on GPRS/EDGE/3G is a painful exercise on the best of days so an email address that pops right off would be a very smart move if you want lots of feedback to improve your breakfast. Make it a priority. Better still get a twitter handle and a facebook fan page that is monitored by living breathing young marketing whizzes at your company.

Your feedback mechanism should factor in laziness and RESPECT it when the feedback process is being designed.

But what if you are a successful, well-known brand. Do you meet the standard? 4 days ago I was waiting for a train in a random metro station here in Delhi and I noticed something. Too few signboards at the station to tell customers INSIDE the train which station they are at. I love the Metro. And so wanted to pass this feedback to help them get even better at their customer experience. So I googled ‘mail address for customer feedback to DMRC’. Landed me on the ‘contact us’ page all right but no email address. So I called the helpline. I got a bored guy who gave me what looked like a very dubious email address (anuj@delhimetrorail.com). I emailed him anyway.

No response from Anuj so far.

I thought about the episode and decided to really test this theory on how easy Indian brands compare against the best in making it easy for a customer to get in touch with them to possibly help the brand get better. And who better to have on your side with that project than you OWN customers. Did you know MOST of India’s top brands assume you ONLY have a grievance!!

The Project :

First I googled the name of the Top 10 brands on the planet.

The experts in this, at http://www.interbrand.com tell me they are :

  1. Coca Cola
  2. IBM
  3. Microsoft
  4. Google
  5. GE
  6. Mcdonalds
  7. Intel
  8. Nokia
  9. Disney
  10. 10.  HP

Source: http://www.interbrand.com/en/best-global-brands/best-global-brands-2008/best-global-brands-2010.aspx

Next I googled the name of the Top 10 brands in India. Brand Equity (of the venerated Economic Times newspaper) tells me India’s top 10 most trusted brands 2010 are :

  1. Nokia
  2. Colgate
  3. Lux
  4. Dettol
  5. Britannia
  6. Lifebouy
  7. Clinic Plus
  8. Pond’s
  9. Fair & Lovely
  10. 10.  Pepsodent

Source : http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/articleshow/6469107.cms

Then I typed the EXACT same search term for all of these 20 brands. Search string was ’email address for customer feedback for [brand name]’

Added ‘India’ after the brand name for Indian firms.

ex: email address for customer feedback for Disney

ex: email address for customer feedback for Lux India

I added India after the brand names in India to help make the search success chances sharper.

I avoided any site not directly affiliated to the company domain name. Here I noticed a company called GetHuman in US that really tries hard to make it easy for someone to get in touch with a human being in a company.

All searches was run from http://www.google.co.in/ on a Firefox version 3.6.16 browser.

Here are the results of my project (click on the image to enlarge it):

click to enlarge
click to enlarge

And since I used nothing but a laptop and decent web browser anyone can try this for their brands.

Interesting tit bits :

Coke and Zappos both use a company called suggestionbox.com to collect feedback and the site looks very robust. Someone is doing something right at http://www.suggestionbox.com

Indian brands are appalling in how difficult they make it for a customer to get in touch with them. They assume you are a complainer right from the start! Only Pepsodent and Pond’s are web 2.0 savvy and Colgate and Fair and Lovely hate you.

If Jeff Immelt is right and if you really never get anything straighter than from a customer, how can you make it easier for her ? Think about that today.

Oh and did I mention India became the Cricket World Champions last night !!

Do you and your city ‘fit’ ? A test.

The Subway in a city is a great way to check what sort of soul the city has and if you and the city are well matched.

Wait. What ??

Allow me.

At rush hour hop into a local metro train (the bus or any other relevant pulblic transport will do too)

Observe behavior but not just of others but also YOURSELF. Now that last bit is a sort of surprise but do remember as much as the multitude is milling around YOU, you too my dear sir, are a part of the multitude. (There is your daily dose of Nietzsche)

How are people behaving inside the coach and critically : when getting off and on at busy stations ? (by the way this test works even with driving situations in peak traffic scenarios). Do people wait for the passengers to exit ? Do you ? Is there unwelcome pushing and jostling beyond the threshold of ‘normal’ ?

Don’t let one ride be the sole basis for conclusions. Take a few as sample data. 4 conclusions are likely to emerge about the city you live in and if you don’t like the quadrant you land onto  : Time for action Spiderman!

I have, from my personal subway rides over the last 2 years,  ranked my own experiences from best to worst.

  1. Amsterdam GVB trams (slow but oh so charming)
  2. Singapore Mass Rapid Transit (efficient. clean. ontime. like the city)
  3. Kuala Lumpur Monorail (so cool. just google it)
  4. Boston ‘T’ (as simple as can be to figure out)
  5. London Tube (my fave by far. just because)
  6. The Brussels Metro (upper middle class crowd all)
  7. Paris Metro (multicultural to the core)
  8. Bangkok Skytrains (meh)
  9. NYC Subway (very working class)
  10. Budapest Metro (quaint as in 1966)
  11. Delhi Metro (growing on me)
  12. Bombay Locals (give me death.now.ppplllease)

Multitaskers need NOT apply

A few years ago Multitasking was all the vogue in the west and the rest. Gadgets abounded to help you with it and the hero was the expert in it. Women boasted how their ilk were better at it.They are. The Cult of More had found it’s shrine.

Today Multitasking stands trashed and maligned in the west. What now passes for multitasking was once called ‘not paying attention’ and that trend of labelling it such is back.

Multitasking is a misnomer. What you’re really doing is switching rapidly between tasks. And every time you switch, you have to start up again. Over the course of a day, you lose a chunk of efficiency.

Here is a typical tip being passed onto the busy successful executive (Good Tips too, pay heed):

For staying on track in a world when everyone is multi-tasking,
1. don’t be at anyone’s beck and call
2. prioritize ruthlessly
3. Minimize interruptions.
4. Turn everything off and take at least 30 minutes of downtime every day to think.
5. For staying productive: Get a good night’s sleep – 8 hours. You’ll be more efficient and mentally sharp.

I was recently in Gurgaon meeting with some folks in my network and saw some really harried execs rushing like headless chicken and was wondered if we were ready for the Single Tasking Culture here.

N E V E R.

For I realised it was difficult considering we VENERATE multitasking ability since forever. Literally. I mean look at them below. ‘my multitasking’ needs a Snake and a Lotus at the same time’. “God Forbid” they come into some 2011 models of the BlackBerry, iPad, Lenovo’s and discover the Triple espresso shot. Bring it on Doctor Octopus!.

DaBossKaliMata@upthere.com. “TAT 24 Minutes. Or your ripped still beating heart back!”

Maybe THATs how they are on top of the prayer requests from the billion+ people here. They NEED those extra hands. And heads. They were onto Distributed Computing and Denial-of-service attack counter tools wayy ahead of the curve.

Rest of you mere mortals read this Time Magazine Article. Now. And give up on this multitasking ‘skill’ . Face it you are no Kali and if YOU had 10 hands you’ll just be Act 4 at the local circus. 

 

Stop chasing MORE INCOME

Look. I am going to do you a favor. Or not. I sure hope it’s the former.

If you already know what you going to see, count this post as an affirmation.
If you were doubtful,know now that you don’t have to be anymore.
If you didn’t ever stop to think about all this so far, consider this an eye opener.

All thanks to this gem on the net : http://www.behaviorgap.com/

An an appetize to the motherlode there, I have put in 3 slides that explain profound truths some people take a lifetime to discover.

I for one wish I knew this stuff earlier. Would have saved me a ton of time and money wasted in the blind alleys of a useless life experiences chasing unworthy goals. A good Scottish buddy of mine keeps asking me why the hell I am so obsessed with charts and venns and two by two’s all the time. It’s because this is the kind of creative stuff I hope to emulate through that medium. My fave two tools are a pen and blank A4s. esp in a Barista. With the BlackBerry switched off. I am then like a kid with lego blocks. I could doodle for hours. I have.

I am surprised we don’t teach this kind of stuff ‘author’ Carl is onto EXPLICITY to kids and adults.

It’s stumbling into stuff like this and losing oneself there that makes this time off from work so very very rewarding.

Pay it forward. Pass this on.

See. Think. Enjoy. Maps to the treasure house were never this EASY to procure.

 

 

On Miswanting and False Goals

A little while ago another blogger I follow devotedly was moaning about how while she had quit living in NYC and was now living in an isolated farm (like she always wanted to), she was bored and miserable at the farm. Here is something this person THOUGHT she wanted for herself but, turns out, in reality she didn’t really like The Reality.

My story: Rock climbing is something I always wanted to take up as a physical hobby as it is healthier than my other exhausting, full body workout passion: Xbox gaming (my opposable thumbs can take on a silverback gorilla by themselves). But when I found myself in Edinburgh and tried rock climbing, I realized, danging exhausted and sore on that indoor wall from hell, that I was not all that into it and if I did it more than twice in a year I was probably over-doing it.

On the OTHER hand, I was always convinced I would HATE exercising if I ever got into it. Turns out…….I love it! The high after it is addictive and there seems to be a direct relationship between the days I exercise and days I count as a ‘good day’. This of course should come as no shock to anyone as it has been documented a million times that exercise improves your mood. This phenomenon on the top left quadrant is now getting attention by psychologists and they have a slick term for it : Miswanting. Suggest you take some time off, go to a barista with a pen and paper and make this grid for YOURSELF. The REAL fun lie in the top left and bottom right quadrants. The other two are bloody obvious (of course you hate the dentist and love chocolate cake). Also try and put experiences and not THINGS in the list and try and put both Past and Future actions into it.

 

Cognitive Tricks to be wary of

One of the best upsides to taking time off from work is the opportunity you get to pursue some of your pet passion projects. My current  time off allowed me to do a ‘deep dive’ (I nicked this word off Jack Welch’ Bio) into a subject I really like : Cognitive bias, a fascinating subset of Social psychology.

What a sad terrible waste it was to spend so much time from 7th standard onwards on deep dives in chemistry, physics and biology, learning arcane stuff we never ever got to apply later in life and missing out on learning a branch of science that is both absorbing and can help so much in our day to day life, since much of our adult life is about living and working with other people in a family and office setting .

Think about it this way : Knowing about Persuasion and Negotiation is wayyy more important and useful than Trigonometry. Here is a terrific summary. Warning : you could lose yourself in there for hours. I wish in school I was tested on THIS instead of THIS!

What got me really interested initially was a book I read called Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Cialdini. Do yourself a ‘LifeFavor’ and check this awesome post : The Psychology of Persuasion at Psyblog, one of my favorite blogs on the subject.

So on that note, I suggest there are two cognitive biases you should be aware of right damn now while watching the million ads during this World Cup matches! Or titled combatively :

Why you should not believe in celebrity endorsements on TV (esp for beauty products!)

Why you should be aware of the Halo effect (esp when voting in South India!)

The Texas sharpshooter fallacy is a logical fallacy in which information that has no relationship is interpreted or manipulated until it appears to have meaning. The name comes from a joke about a Texan who fires some shots at the side of a barn, then paints a target centered on the biggest cluster of hits and claims to be a ‘sharpshooter’

When the many many actors and actresses from Bollywood or the players from the Indian Cricket team exhort for us to buy their endorsed product they are counting on you to fall very pliantly into the Texas sharpshooter fallacy. Ash selling L’Oreal : “I am awesome because I use  L’Oreal! Girls, You can be too if you use L’Oreal!”, here L’Oreal claiming their models were all gorgeous and luckily happen to now be famous enough to ensorse the brand! Bachan selling ANYTHING  “I am awesome because I use  X! You can be too if you use X India!” Where do I even begin with the Indian cricket team.

The Halo effect is a cognitive bias whereby the perception of one trait (i.e. a characteristic of a person or object) is influenced by the perception of another trait (or several traits) of that person or object. An example would be judging a good-looking person as more intelligent. N. T. Rama Rao, Jayalalithaa and M. G. Ramachandran are classic examples of voters fooled into the Halo effect and assuming since these people were so good and pure and righteous in the movies, they MUST be that in real life PLUS great administrators and so “Here are the keys to the state treasury!” Not a single one of them can claim an untainted and honorable political legacy.  Why are we southiees esp prone to this stupid fallacy ? Is it the excess rice mushing up our brains ? But then the US and Indian Software and IT engine pretty much runs on  South Indian fuel. So to those sniggering that only us gullible southies are prone to this infection I say two names: Ronld Regan and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Look at how Arnold messed up California.

While these two cognitive tricks can fool us in innumerable setting I just you want to focus on it from an angle of a Consumer (buyer,voter).

Just Another Customer: Caveat emptor!

 

How Indian Education failed my generation

Let’s make a very random list of transformational technologies introduced in our lifetime :

Smartphones and cellphones (example: A iphone or a BlackBerry)
Portable computing ( example : a dell laptop, an ipad or a Mac)
The Internet
The internet available EVERYWHERE (on your phone,laptop,anytime)
eBooks (Kindle)
Facebook
Retail DNA Tests
Wikipedia
Potable music players (ipod, cheap mp3 players)
Good cheap digital cameras.
Youtube
AbioCor Artificial Heart
NASA’s Ares Rockets

Recently I downloaded and installed an app on my iphone call ‘Evernote’.
Guess what Evernotes’ tagline is ? “REMEMBER EVERYTHING”
It’s a fantastic tool to capture anything that I deem important or worth remembering.
As a user I must admit it BLOWS me away with the hint of what it is truly capable of.

Yet why is the educational system here still pretending, in 2011 A.D, that the most important trait in a good student is the ability to REMEMBER facts and trivia ?!? Almost like all those 13 items mentioned above happened in Pandora to the Na’vis ?
Is life one long quiz show ? When was it anyway ?
In a world with Wikipedia, SIRI, 100 rupees unlimited gprs plan, wolfram, cheap 500 GB Hard drives and even cheaper laptops why is that THE MOST IMPORTANT SKILL deemed to be emulation and reward worthy by the educational system Memory ?

Entrants into the corporate world are till date admitted only on having the necessary ‘qualification’ (an MBA degree, a bachelors) but this qualificatin is mostly just an official ratification of the fact that the individual in question has the demonstrated ability to retain outdated google’able information for the minimal necessary period of time (mostly from the night before the exam till the end of the test the day after).

We need to wake up and realise Education should not be time travel (“Lets all pretend we are in 1967 and you will all be working in a govt department in 1971“)

And we need to focus on finding and hiring people who are more than just good organic USB sticks.

When we bemoan the lack of enough good managers and leaders in the corporate world or the absence of enough innovation and creativity in the workplace, maybe we all need to step back and understand that the bouncers at the club entrance (HR?) are just checking for good elephants and letting them in. On the flip side, most of the acedemic front benchers are asking themselves “I was so good at getting high marks in school and being the teacher’s pet. Why am I not catapulting up the corporate ladder?”  The answer, of course, is that most of getting what you want at work is about having social skills, and school doesn’t measure that.

When you, the valuable customer, hang up after that very frustrating call with the idiot customer service rep who seemed incapable of either empathy or wit to sort the issue , do remember the system only needed to know she could remember the date Babur invaded India to give her the necessary qualifying degree to jump into the workforce and answer your call.