Bullshit Marketing 101

I may not have scraped too much off the passing wisdom iceberg but if asked to dispense something memorable in the here and now, a week into my 37th birthday, here it is :

NEVER TRUST ANY ADVERTISEMENT THAT FEATURES CUTE ANIMALS OR KIDS.

American novelist Sinclair Lewis wryly noted early on that ‘Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless.’

imageIn the 21st century most sellers of un-needed goods (and 99% are that) are guilty of the wasteful crime of producing worthless same-as-the-next one-in-the-aisle products. They know this. The ad team they desperately hire to peddle the product knows this. Much more alarmingly for them both, the buyers are catching on.

The real solution of making something genuinely needed and nice is a hard tough route. That’s too much effort. So now the lazy ad team injects a cute baby or a adorable puppy, hoping the idiot consumer (that’s YOU by the way) is distracted enough by the ‘awwww‘ feeling long enough to reach into his purse and hand over the money. The only time this rule is invalid is when the end user of the product is an actual baby or puppy.

image Ads like these are an immediate insulting inadvertent revelation by the seller and her ad team of how little they all think of your general intelligence. For the ad is obliquely saying that a list of real benefits or features won’t convince you as much as a aww prop. Or maybe when they don’t have any REAL benefits or distinguishing feature, this shameful tactic is EVEN more useful.

The next time you see these type of bullshit ads, don’t fall for it.

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